eblouissante*
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
éblouissante's LiveJournal:
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| Monday, July 20th, 2009 | | 2:29 pm |
There are many reasons why we write in our blogs. To put this more precisely, there are many people for whom we do. * I need to think about this more - but... I've come a long way from my days at pitas when I virtually put down anything that came to my head, no-holds-barred(every time I read those entries I want to slap my younger self, all the while muttering 'you were so pathetic' - I wonder when there'll come a time when looking back, I will not want to do this. I think when I'm eighty and decrepit [if I live to eighty] I will still want to thwack my seventy-nine year old self with my walking stick), to putting down things I especially wanted people to hear, still no-holds-barred, pretty much, to not putting down anything at all, because communication moved to emails, letter post, and facebook. * This entry is for some of my oldest classmates, for Jin Rou, Shi Min, Xin Hui and Bibi particularly, who've read and commented so much. I'm not really sure what it is that I want to say, but I'm going to try. It's this feeling that I've had since we met up last week, when I felt a distance that couldn't be shrugged off, and I got scared, because I didn't realise I might have been losing something, whose importance I didn't quite realise till I feared it might be gone. ... I just wanted to say this, to begin to repair for my neglect. To the people who've known me since I was ridiculous (much much more so than now, as my old blog entries can so readily attest), tolerated all the silly tantrums, become my friend for reasons unknown... I'm really grateful, and I hope we'll still be friends, even as our worldviews seem to fly apart, and we have no idea what the other is doing, and one of us is like an alien who spends much of her time gallivanting across the oceans, building castles in the air. I hope you do too. |
| Thursday, May 14th, 2009 | | 12:27 pm |
Patrick Park
How often we forget how strange it is to be alive at all. |
| Wednesday, February 11th, 2009 | | 1:44 pm |
I long for the sea I long for the sea I long for the sea the crash of waves to drown my thoughts I want to leap into that embrace which caresses the rocks * Things I want to learn: 1) Cut hair by self 2) Acupuncture 3) to be a better person |
| Monday, February 9th, 2009 | | 1:03 pm |
wanted: your opinion
I need a haircut. Preferably before my twentieth birthday. I'm thinking of doing it myself. Yes? No? |
| Tuesday, December 16th, 2008 | | 3:39 pm |
sadly, an increasingly familiar feeling
Sometimes, if I stay in my room long enough, I forget who I am. If a tree falls in a forest where no one can hear it, has it fallen? No, actually. I don't think you exist if no one knows you're there... if no one can hear you breathing. * Anyway, I wanted to say how I almost don't remember a time when I looked forward to striking up conversation with complete strangers - that glimmer of satisfaction, exploding into warmth and laughter, as you forge a brand new connection with another human soul and feel you are one more step closer to understanding this world we live in. One down, 6.7 billion left to go. Do you think it's true that all human interaction is at least casual flirtation? Anyway I no longer remember when I could do this... and I think cultural barriers can be very perplexing. It's a terrible feeling, to be sitting opposite someone you don't know at the dinner table, to be trying to making conversation, to be getting short replies in return, and absolutely no smile. Like an invisible wall (but not a soundproof screen) has descended, preventing yourself from being seen, because that person keeps looking left, right, wistfully over at the boisterous group beside you (whom you both don't know), even down at his plate, anywhere but where you could possibly make eye contact. And as your self-confidence dwindles into nothingness and your powers of speech fail, as your good humour blackens into despair and your mind whirls with confusion, you think: When, and how did the nonchalance of not-knowing harden into stolid indifference? And you wonder... am I really so boring? Or worse, such a turn-off? And you silently telepath, at a furious frequency: Yes, I know I'm making small-talk. And it's small-talk of the most pathetic kind, but at least I am trying. * Sometimes.... when I am really bored, I actually revist our old pitas pages - well I only remember jinrou's and xinhui's, and mine of course, anymore. They have an unmistakeable feel of abandonment - I think it is very piquant, how cyber space, even if it is unreal, can be abandoned too, and you see it in the unused tagboards full of spam, the broken links to images, the stagnant content. |
| Saturday, September 13th, 2008 | | 9:19 pm |
OMG
I am FILLED with inertia. Which is bad as I haven't started packing. OKAY I AM GETTING A MOVE ON NOW. |
| Thursday, September 4th, 2008 | | 5:49 pm |
So I promised that I am going to try and share more of the things they make me happy. I've also been a bit frustrated by how my lj looks in general, and especially on mozilla. Furthermore, I've been meaning to try out Tumblr. CSS coding is still beyond me and it doesn't look perfect, but here's the place. For things that make me happy. |
| Thursday, August 28th, 2008 | | 11:53 pm |
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| Thursday, July 31st, 2008 | | 11:04 am |
Yesterday I was floating on a cloud of bliss, listening to the score from The English Patient and Por Una Cabeza. I am now typing this in the Resource Room of the RG staffroom @ Andersen (because you see... there are about three staffrooms and they are all named after, I imagine, roads, as if the campus were a pioneer settlement or some such thing). Sometimes, just thinking about happy feelings (like the one I had yesterday) can make you smile. (: Anyway, back to the staffroom. I am sitting here and I am wondering, "Why. why does it have to be so cold??" Okay I have just spotted the remote control and I have raised the thermostat by three degrees to twenty six. I know I am rambling about almost nothing in particular... but I swear I had something else to say. And it is that I was seized by a sudden nostalgia for Italy. Oh and now I have to go for class but someday I will attempt to put my feelings into words. |
| Saturday, June 7th, 2008 | | 2:53 pm |
Hello! You are not hallucinating this entry. Okay I do not have much to say. Everything about departure, about change, about emptiness and excitement, uncertainty and longing, about heartache and zen that could possibly have passed through my mind in the past two weeks since graduation has been poured into letters, notes, facebook posts and emails and I have very little more to say. I remember the first time before I came here, scouring our rather uninformative website for information, thinking of the residence I would like to live in. You always appreciate something more after it has happened, especially because it changes you in such a way that you are able to love every little minute detail of life and you get better at embracing the moment. I just visited the website again, for old time's sake, and I saw the information for the ten-year reunion that will happen here this summer. It made me think of how mine will be. I really hope I'm a better person now... it's as though, I could sense how I'd changed through secondary school, and the little while after entering JC, but now I'm not even the same person who was at hwach. How I grew through secondary school was very much part of a maturation process, with a lot of guidance from my friends, family and teachers. How I feel at the end of these two years is quite different; it's more fundamental, it might be more undetectable. I have decided to stop drawing smug conclusions about myself and how far I've come, because I've learnt that there's no time in my life when I will be able to say: Okay, that's it, I've decided, this is my character, this is my personality, these are my values and my ideals in life. There's really nothing I regret. Not even not having practised more italian Xb I have learnt a lesson that I think will serve me pretty well: that is, to find contentment. I am a much more contented person now. I think that is because my goals are not as lofty, and because I have stopped seeing getting to places in life as some sort of natural progression but as something I have to deserve (maybe you're surprised I ever thought that way but yes, I did). I don't think I will be living in Singapore for a long time in the future. I want to live in many different places in the world, because this is one life that I have on this Earth, which is much more than a single country. I think of myself now (more than ever before), as a human being, and not simply, Chinese, or Singaporean. Being Asian and having been born and brought up in Singapore will always be undeniable parts of who I am (especially, how I can be ungrateful for it, to have found such friends as all of you who are reading this), but I also want to know other cultures and societies, because ultimately, they are a part of me too. We are all a part of the long history of humanity, that we are still writing, climate change permitting. Okay... I have to run, but I just want to say, for the bajillionth time, that I love you all, and I really mean that. I may be exceptionally tender and sentimental right now, on account of having said so many goodbyes in such a short time... Amanda I swear I cried more than a lot of people in these few weeks. I surprised even myself. How simply it came. See, I am possibly more human now. Last thing, a rather abashed apology to everyone, for not having written more here while I've been away and you've been at home... I wrote this on a facebook comment to Amanda, and I realise how true it is. That, being around someone everyday means that you know almost every detail of their life, including what they had for breakfast and what they are wearing that day. It's the little things like this that you miss, and every other moment I think of random people and I wonder what they are doing, exactly now. So I wish I had told you more about my random daily activities, described things that made me happy, because there were so many things that did. Oh dear why am I tearing. Okay so... we'll see each other soon! Thank you for having been there, and for being here now, and always. Wanjie |
| Thursday, February 28th, 2008 | | 10:26 am |
Somedays I think I could be happy forever. * It feels like such a shame, to leave it like that, seeing as I hardly blog. Anyhow, Spring Break is over. Yvonne came and visited, and I hope she had a lovely time, weather permitting. We had the most incredible fog I have ever witnessed here. At one point I could only barely see the outdoors staircase that leads up to my room. It was a pity, as the view from Fore Lawn of the lights of Trieste, and the lighthouse, is extremely gorgeous and we could see nothing of that for the days she was here. And in the day, you couldn't see anything of Istria or Croatia. Yesterday, Julie and I were holed up in the Art Centre for virtually the entire day, painting a panel for the set for the school production - A Midsummers Night's Dream. Our teacher, Charlotte, wanted it all Bosch like... check out his 'Garden of Earthly Delights' for an example. However, we converted it to a night scene, and left out the man-eating bird, to make it a little less grosteque. The version of the production that is going to be put up I think is supposed to be somewhat dark and sinister and jungly. There's still another panel (we painted the 'female' panel with Titania and birds) i.e. the male one with cats and Oberon, and then two huge paper mache trees and giant jungle flowers and the enormous omnipresent full moon. :) Art, and good company, is so addictive. I think I shall start a game of Assassin within the school. I wanted it as an introductory week item but many people objected for reasons I still dont' really understand :) More later, now I have to run. <3 |
| Friday, January 11th, 2008 | | 5:05 pm |
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| Monday, December 24th, 2007 | | 10:19 am |
bisous
Salut mes chers! Je suis enfin, apres tant te temps, a Paris, en France, la belle France. En anglais, bon. I should post a little about my travels, perhaps. We left school on 14 Dec, Friday, taking a flight from Venice to Stockholm. There, we sang in their main square and spent the night in a rentable chalet which had two saunas (it's a very nordic thing, to take a sauna in the winter because it's so warm and wonderful... and you go in naked, usually, like in a public bath) so that was a bonding experience with my friends from school. Axel (my co-year from Sweden who planned this leg of the trip) and his family took care of us. His parents cooked wonderful spicy fish soup, which we had with fantastic nordic bread and cheese (I loved the cheese), finished off with swedish brownish, mountains of whipped cream (two huge bowls that we couldn't finish) and an unlimited supply of gingerbread, which is very common in this season. In Finland as well of course. The next day we took the ferry to Helsinki, which was a cruise, rather. The beds were extremely comfortable, it was four a room with your own shower. The facilities were not Star-Cruise level, unsurprisingly, it's only a night, but there was still plenty to do. Firstly, there was a Sauna, if you desired, Karaoke, Disco, restaurants, pubs and bars, a duty free shopping deck where I bought lots of Finnish/Estonian chocolate (which is so wonderful I'm sad you can't taste it and WHY don't they export it? My favourite which my friend recommended is an Estonian white chocolate bar with blue berries and a puffed rice base. I gave Yvonne a bar and she loved it). Most of the evening I passed with Julie, my coyear from UK. First we went up on deck, where there was ice and it was bitingly cold (but not as bad as Stockholm, somehow). We ran into the Italian guys and Bar from Israel on the top deck, where they were having dinner and waiting for their beer (placed outside) to cool. In the end though, they only managed to attain 'fresca' (fresh) and not 'freddo' (cold) haha. Julie and I eventually found ourselves at the Kid's floor, the arcade, where we passed about an hour happily banging away on this drum game. You pick a song (they have a large variety) and you drum away coordinating with the screen... I kept winning. And my favourite was 'Breakfast at Tiffany's' although they also had La Bamba and the Pokemon sound track (: Then they had to close at 10pm so we went to the Karaoke, where there was a middle-aged lady singing traditional Finnish songs in between all the rock and pop ones belted out by younger people. Finally I decided to get some rest and retired to my cabin, where it wasn't really rest since we were talking etc! Oh no I don't want to go into so much detail for the rest of my trip... seeing as it would take forever. Brieflyyy Upon our arrival at Helsinki, we were taken to a school, Alppiland High School, in whose gym we spent the next two nights. They were very lovely, they provided us with a free lunch everyday in their canteen and I ate so much, I love finnish food though it can sometimes be a bit strange. Some people detest their sweet oatmeal porridge type thing. We gave workshops and had performances with them, and also observed them performing their traditional dance. It's their version of prom I think, at the second year of high school, everyone has the opportunity to learn this traditional dance and it's wonderful to watch. The problem, (and it seems to be everywhere) is that girls outnumber guys so the girl asks the guy to partner her, or a guy from another school, and sometimes guys are borrowed from the lower grades. I loved Helsinki as a city, the people are so warm and wonderful. When you're preparing the jaywalk illegally, and are hesitating at the side of the road, the cars actually stop for you! Without any indication on your part. We wandered through the town, I saw Orthodox churches for the first time (after all the Catholic cathedrals of Italy) and visited their huge christmas market, which is full of homemade produce, preserved fish, felted items, wool, fur, etc. We also visited an island south of Helsinki, Suomenlinnaa, on which you can find a fort built by the Swedes to defend against the Russians when Finland was still part of Sweden. That was very charming, and interesting. It is quite a large island, actually three islands joined together, and we were clambering over its rocky face completely in the dark (as it is dark by four) and it reminded me of Scotland. On Wednesday we took the train north to Rovaniemi, on the arctic circle. We were hosted by host families for one night... my host was really lovely, she lives with her boyfriend (which was a bit awkward for me but they were both very nice) who all came from a school we were visiting. We participated in their end of term christmas celebrations, and also gave workshops, and I attended a french and art history class (first in french, second in finnish). One of the best things about Rovaniemi was visiting the Santa Clause Village Xb, meeting him, having my picture taken (it's an exorbitant thirty euros to buy the photos but the finns were so lovely they surprised us with them as a memory) and I also posted three post cards from Santa's village in the artic circle (: One to my christmas friend from St-Maarten in the Caribbean. We left Rovaniemi on Friday, taking a train down to Helsinki. I left with some people at Tampere, the third largest city in Finland, which was where my flight would depart. Spent the night day, and visited the Moomin Valley museum. I know hardly anyone in Singapore knows about Moomin but it is very famous elsewhere. It is a series of children books written and illustrated by a Finnish woman of the Swedish minority. The illustrations were gorgeous, I swear Hayao Miyazaki might have been influenced in some part by her, especially since she is very popular in Japan. I left Tampere on Sunday to fly to Bremen, where I caught my connecting flight to Paris. I had an EXTREMELY eventful time making my way to Yvonne's flat... The flight couldn't land in Paris Beauvais because of weather problems, apparantly visibility was only 300m instead of the requisite 700m. I was sad not to be able to see the eiffel from the air, perhaps, and at night, but what was worse was when we were forced to land at Lille, which is two hours away from Paris by bus. Ryan air provided the bus, but it was madness trying to figure out which ones they were, getting your luggage loaded and going on to find a space. As a french woman I overheard expressed it, 'C'est un peu de la panique.' We arrived in Paris central, Porte Maillot, at around 12 midnight (the original flight had been scheduled to land at quarter past eight) and I had to take the metro to Yvonne's flat. While buying my ticket, this french guy with an asian travelling companion (who spoke fluent french so she was probably brought up there) remarked: "You were in airport with us." The problem was that his accent was so heavy I didn't really understand him, and I was already nervous from being alone in the metro in Paris at midnight (though really it was somewhat safe) and could only manage "I'm sorry?" in english. He must have found me somehow condescending (but that was COMPLETELY unconscious I assure you) because the next thing I heard was 'F**k you' which was totally unmerited! Nerves shaken, I got my ticket and made my way to the platform. Got to my interchange alright, was confused from there. Was approached by a random guy who went 'Hi' in french and then 'Ni hao' after I pointedly ignored him, pretending not to understand french... meh. I mean all these opportunities from random conversations to pratise french and I can't take them. I found the right metro, and got on after calling Yvonne. An african guy sitting behind me asked me "Parlez-vous francais?' twice but having been told not to speak to strangers I smile at him vaguely and ignore him, again, pretending not to speak french :( About three minutes later he launches into a lecture in english about politeness and how it might cost me someting to speak to my frend on the one but it doesn't cost me anything to respond to a friendly inquiry. And that I was free to decline if he asked me to go somewhere with him but one should not be rude to polite attempts at conversation. During his lecture, I just smiled and the other cuy in the car was looking over. He reminded me a little of my Senegalese friend, Abdoulaye at college (the african guy not the other one). When he had finished his spiel I smiled and said, in english, you're right. And after that he seemed uninterested in any more conversation and took out his newspaper, but I decided he was nice so I commented on his english ability and he informed me about how he was educated in university in Germany where he had taken English courses, but moved to Paris from middle scohol in Cote d'Ivoire so his first language was French, and now he was a semi-refugee in Paris as he couldn't find a place to stay and was too late to register for University for this term. At some point in our conversation, the other guy in the cabin comes over. He is really quite cute, tall and slim with nice features but he is brunette, and he asks me if I come from California (because of my english). I say Singapore and then turns back to the African guy, not wanting to ignore him (because you know, one lecture on politeness a night is enough). The other guy settles somewhere near us and I think we might have a wonderful three way conversation and then... the train STOPS. There are random announcements in french but I expect it to start moving at any moment, when suddenly the young man stands up and says, "We have to get off." He does so and promptly disappears :( I leave the train with the African guy, and we stand on the platform for about twenty minutes with other marooned people, until it is clear there will not be another train. I was only three stops from my destination. The African guy and I go up onto the streets and I try to figure out how to get to Yvonne's flat. He tells me about night buses but I am seriously unconfident about those, and Yvonne calls and urges me to take a taxi because it's an hour to her flat from where I am on foot. A South Asian couple (vietnam, not sure) near me come up to me and urge me to take a taxi and not go anywhere with the African guy -_-U. We are all at a Taxi stand. Finally, a taxi arrives, and they make me go in before them, which was really sweet, and I say bye to the African guy, wishing him a Merry Christmas and for him to find a logement soon. Then I am charged nine euros by the taxi driver for a five minute drive but it's okay because it was an emergency, I find myself in Yvonne's flat after dragging (with ehr help) my luggage up seven flights) and she is now making sushi for breakfast. (: The end, for now. I still have three weeks of vacation and I want to go home!! <3 Wanjie P.S. It's minus one outside! The artic circle was less cold haha. |
| Sunday, December 16th, 2007 | | 1:39 pm |
Hello! Writing from a museum (levande historia) in stockholm. It is virtually deserted but has a wonderful library of books on human rights and computer terminals with free internet (: I am enjoying myself, despite the cold, which actually isn´t that bad. Boarding an overnight ferry to Helsinki this afternoon. More of a cruise than a ferry we have our own rooms but it´s definitely going to be fun! <3 Wanjie |
| Sunday, December 9th, 2007 | | 3:05 pm |
se una notte d'inverno un viaggiatore
Hello my dears, Okay, very briefly. Cambridge: Okay, I suppose. At least it went smoothly, I didn't get held up at Stansted, I found my college after wandering around for rather a bit of time. The interviews were fine I answered all questions think i could have done myself a little more justice. No idea how the interviewers thought though they are inscrutable. Winter Break: I'm leaving with my school for street performance to Stockholm, Helsinki and Lapland on Friday! This will be absolutely fantastic (and hopefully not too freezing) except I have to finish a mountain of work before hand. After winter break I head to Paris on the 23rd to stay with Yvonne, and I'm going with her to visit her friend in S. Germany on the 27th and returning after New Years. After that, who knows? I WANT TO GO HOME. <3 Mi mancate! P.S. Yesterday went to Monfalcone with a group of friends, intending to go to the Amusement park (or Lunaparc in italian) where there are swings and bumper cars but it was CLOSED. Instead we bought a gelato cake and shared it. And took crazy jumping photos in the piazza. Which was as awesome. |
| Tuesday, August 28th, 2007 | | 3:37 pm |
questa è d'italia
Ciao tutti! This is pretty overdue... well alright. I have been tremendously busy since the moment I got back, especially since I was planning an important event that took place on Sunday (Duino Odyssey - Amazing Race type thing), and it's hard to find time to settle somewhere with an internet connection. So, updates! I am in FORE, sharing a double room with Sarah. Most of the people I'm closer Which is my first choice. I have a room with a seaview (:. My bed is right opposite the window and right now we have a gorgeous fullmoon over the sea. One night it shone right onto my bed. We also have a nook. Agh got to go. More soon! |
| Tuesday, June 19th, 2007 | | 12:46 pm |
another day another essay
Ramming my head into my bookcase is not going to help me begin my extended essay. Neither will watching Kim Possible for that matter. * At least I don't have block tests in a week. It's silly to compare fates. Still, wanna swap? |
| Monday, May 28th, 2007 | | 7:40 pm |
the end of another year
Hello carissimi miei (caro, carissimo, carissimi) I'm back! With little fanfare. No fanfare is necessary really, but I do dearly wish to see all of you. <3 If you'd like to know exactly when and how, I touched down yesterday at about elevenohfive am in Changi, after a wonderful (though tiring) trip from Milan, with a stopover in Bangkok. From Milan to Bangkok I spent about ten fantastic hours speaking with my co-year Bar from Israel who travelled with me. He's spending about two weeks in Thailand with another coyear :) That was precious, because I felt like I got to know him more in those few hours than in the entire year. On Thursday 24 May was our Closing Ceremony, of which I have many pictures which aren't with me, since my battery died. After that, many people left directly, but I spent the night, not exactly sleeping, but on the streets in front of Mickey's (our town bar/club/cafe) where almost everyone was congregated for our least moments together. Early on Friday morning at around 6am I left Duino on a bus for the train station, taking a train to Milan, where I picked up my ticket and then headed for Malpensa. All alone Xb. And then I met Bar the next day while checking in at the counter. ( What I penned on Friday 25th May in Malpensa ) |
| Friday, March 2nd, 2007 | | 5:28 pm |
very very short
hey :) Just returned from Project Week (mine was in Cambridge and London and terribly expensive but oh well. This is relative to other groups who managed to get sponsors etc, and it's a complaint bcause there's a certain accomplishment to be had in keeping costs to zero) and snatching a moment to say a few words. I always feel so bad not updating because all my darling friends keep telling me to and they spoil me so much with letters etc. Incidentally, most of the point of this entry is to say that before I left I received XinHui's adorable envelope in my pigeongehole :))) I'm definitely parading my mandarins when we have our 肉干 eating session among the chinese. <3 And I hope school has picked up in terms of excitement! Just hang on, you're almost at the end, and once you're there you are really going to miss the days you had to wear a uniform to school. Oh, and crepe making sessions! Like, and I'm not kidding, you get more french than I do here in Europe. Truly truly truly. Sigh. There's so much I can say about Project Week! Ours was really really successful indeed (apart from the cost thing). Among the things we did include: Attend UK launch of the International Polar Year at the Royal Society in London Tour the British Antarctic Survey in Cambridge - viewed Mapping section, Ice Cores, Dobson ozone spectrophotometer that was used to discover the Ozone hole Visit Scott Polar Research Institute Museum Visit House of Commons and interview Colin Challen MP, Chairman of Interparty Climate Change Committee Tour House of Lords with Lord Parry Mitchell, who was on the Technology and Science Panel When I say it was very successful I meant everything went off without a hitch. We made all our appointments on time, all these important people were so warm and kind and seemed pleased to have met us (and didn't appear as though they thought they'd wasted an hour/afternoon of their lives). Also I learnt so much, and experienced a fundamental paradigm shift (although this balance between interest and disinterest I've been treading for many years) and it was altogether a very great experience. There were minimal hiccups and no major arguments within the group, though it was possible to have had them. The essential point of our project was to learn about polar issues, which in this day and age, are inextricably linked to the problem of global warming, which is, in fact, why so many people see the third IPY as so timely. Now when I go back to Singapore there's so much I want to do to help change our country's attitude towards energy consumption and the environment in general. I'm even thinking of scrapping my proposed two weeks in France and return directly in Summer. I already spoke to Ms Tan and if she still remembers her promise, I get to write at least an article on my experience and have them published and I really hope I will be able to give a presentation at RG. If that happens, it'll be the third time I'm presenting at assembly, and on something environmental, only this time without Sarah and Amanda, probably. Hopefully when the time comes I won't be nervous or think it's not such a big deal anymore. Okay I didn't bring my camera to London, but at least I went to the Tate modern and slid down the tubes. (Unfortunately, I thought you had to pay for the higher levels and therefore didn't even try, being the cost-conscious student backpacker that I was. Then I found out that no you did not but I am in Italy now and it is too late). London was quite uneventful really; I didn't lose anything etc, despite being told how scary and unsafe it was and that I really should keep my credit card in my socks. OKAY. SO. It's back to school, I have the run of the place to myself for practically a day since most of the college has yet to return from their project weeks. I have to submit my EE subject choice form on Monday and I still haven't the faintest clue what subject I want to do! I am going to die... because it's really really difficult to think of anything really. They are quite restrictive when it comes to the sort of topic they want. EE is Extended essay = research paper in 4000 words. Oh sigh I am going to fry. Also we are approaching the time when we have to elect our new Student Representatives (there are two for each year). Their role is self-explanatory, liaising with the admin and running the assemblys etc. I was nominated to run by someone (which isn't saying much considering that a) people have this idea that native speakers are good SRs and b) there were 18 others on the list) but I'm really unsure if I want to. First of all, I've never had very good experiences with this sort of campaign-and-get-people-to-vote-for-you kind of thing, and secondly, because what I really want is to make something decent out of the choir here, so becoming SR might get in the way of me being choir director (which incidentally you also have to audition for therefore it is by no means confirmed). Still, it is definitely an important thing, being SR, and well, someone nominated me (something which makes me happy because I am unconfident and insecure) and actually a handful of people have asked me to run and told me they'd support me, hence the dilemna. And whoever I ask will tell me, follow your heart, and it's your decision, and well great advice but I really don't know what that is. This isn't turn out to be such a short entry after all. Bought two beautiful books (no literally, for their covers, and the comments of course, since I'd never heard of them before) in Cambridge for a pound each, something which makes me very happy. Actually felt unhappy speaking english most of the time in England. Ooh, maybe I can't actually live in a country where English is the staple language. Ponder. Okay weird what I am I saying. In the airport returning, we ran into students from the UWC at Wales. They were beginning *their* project week, and it was a choir of 45 travelling to Austria to perform :(. I wish our choir was half as pro. They were really genial though, makes me wish for more inter-uwc exchanges :(( Okay So. I shall go and clear my overflowing inbox and possiby bang my head against a nearby wall in the hopes that some ideas will drop out of my ear. Yes I know I'm pathetic at imagery. I have been traipsing around in the cold spring air again with my hair wet. I am going to stop doing that or I'll end up with headsplitting migraines when I'm older. I am a stupid person. Right, productivity ho. Je pense a vous :)) |
| Monday, February 19th, 2007 | | 7:25 pm |
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